Monday, 6 June 2005

New Report Finds Britain is "Hideously White"

All socially aware people have long suspected it, the line-up at the upcoming Live 8 concerts has highlighted it, but now a report to be released today by the Committee on Racial Affairs has confirmed it: Britain is “hideously white”. The report found that upto 91% of the population of Britain is white. “This can’t go on,” said Dr Donald Watkins, who co-authored the report. “I find it offensive that in this day and age so many people in Britain are white. It is a disgrace.”
.....Institutions, such as the BBC, have been reprimanded before on precisely this issue. The new report, however, makes it clear that the problem is not confined to institutions: the problem extends all the way down into wider society. Indeed, the hideous whiteness of institutions is an accurate reflection of society at large. As Prof. Tetherton, a sociologist at the University of East Anglia, explains, “Because 91% of the population is hideously white, it means that the institutions naturally tend to take on the same horrific hue. If we are serious about tackling the problem, we must eradicate it at the root. Only this way can we create a freer, more equal society.”
.....Chris Martin, of the popular beat combo Coldplay, was unsurprised by the findings: “Most of my teachers at school were white, most of the people in my street were white, even my parents were white. I think it’s disgusting. People don’t seem to realise just how offensive it is. And when you consider that most shareholders are white, well, then we know we are dealing with the most unspeakable evil.”
.....The report comes after weeks of mounting pressure on the government to make known its understanding of the extent of the problem. “It seems there has been a lack of will on the part of politicians to tackle this issue,” said Emily Burton, spokeswomen for the independent think-tank Totalitas. “But now the government cannot ignore it.”
.....The report also places greater pressure on the organisers of the Live 8 concerts to change the racial constitution of its performers. “The thought of old white people playing guitars makes me physically sick,” said one activist.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

This can't be a serious post, surely? Sounds like whites are the new Kulak.

Deogolwulf said...

Just joking. And I find the best jokes come from following the logic of knaves.

Anonymous said...

Enjoyed the joke, and followed the logic!

Trouble is, some may find difficulty in seeing and understanding sarcasm when it is deployed in a field which is nearer to their own prejudices than they might care to admit!

Anonymous said...

As a representative of the Trans-ethnic Community of Britain I can assure you that it is no longer neccessary to be trapped in the wrong ethnicity.Whilst experiments in the US have not been all that might be wished for,we here in Britain are at the forefront of the great Trans-ethnic movement.

Anonymous said...

[[Trouble is, some may find difficulty in seeing and understanding sarcasm when it is deployed in a field which is nearer to their own prejudices than they might care to admit]]

The trouble is one can believe it to be true because we have been pc'ed to death to believe all the worst of the "hideously white"........

john b said...

Brian -

"Sounds like whites are the new Kulak[s]"

No, what you're doing there is confusing a privileged majority who lead rather pleasant and agreeable lives, with a hated minority who are being brutally exterminated. So you're wrong in both concept (the whites are in charge in the UK and aren't being even slightly oppressed) and degree (while other races are discriminated against in the UK, this tends not to involve brutal state-sanctioned murder). Good one.

BTW, I've made you Idiot of the Century on Shot by both sides.

Dave Heasman said...

The term "hideously white" was used of the BBC by its previous Director-General Greg Dyke, shortly after he was appointed - in 2000. So top points for timely quipping, here.

His point was that non-white people were contributing their share of the licence fee but not watching the BBC's output, and he thought there might be a connection between that and the racial makeup of the BBC's staff.

It's not obviously absurd, or even particularly knavish (we really are channeling Wallace Arnold, aren't we? In our sturdy tweeds?) to take this position.

Anonymous said...

john b - so we are not being oppressed then. How is the imposition (imposed as we have never been consulted) of an ever growing army of alien people in our country not a form of oppression? Or does that only count if you are Tibetan? Demographics being what they are, we will be a minority soon enough.

Anonymous said...

john b wrote:

...the whites are in charge in the UK and aren't being even slightly oppressed...

From the BBC after the horrendous Kriss Donald murder:

The most recent analysis shows that in 2004, 87,000 people from black or minority ethnic communities (BME) said they had been a victim of a racially motivated crime. In the same period, 92,000 white people said they had also fallen victim. Focusing on violent racial attacks, 49,000 BME were victims. Among whites, the number was 77,000. Of those that involved wounding 4,000 were BME. Among the white population it was 20,000.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6128466.stm

How on earth can a small minority victimize a large majority more than the large majority victimizes the small minority? Easily: the small minority is considerably more vicious.

But of course the expert BBC statistician has this to say:

The numbers can be highly misleading, though. Since about 90% of people in Britain are white, the statistics actually show the risk of being a victim of race crime is significantly greater if you are from an ethnic minority.

So it's 'highly misleading' because 'risk' is what matters. In fact, 1-on-1, whites are hugely more at risk from non-whites than vice versa, and as non-white numbers grow, the risk for whites increases.

Anonymous said...

Where can I find a copy of this report? Thank you...